During a recent session, a client was describing a situation where a member of a group experienced a significant meltdown. In a room full of gifted healers and counselors, one person answered the call to action. They helped the person to breathe and ground through the mental break until they returned to presence. Only the leader of the group acknowledged the great work, but no one ever mentioned it again.
As my client was seeking understanding as to the lack of acknowledgment from others, the angels whispered the words ‘competitive shame’. Competitive means relating to a situation in which people or groups are trying be more successful than others. Shame means a feeling of guilt, regret, sadness, or embar-rassment for something you did or did not do.
In a group setting, it’s easy to respond in ways that turn into some feeling of being ‘on’, performing, or perceiving some form of enhanced emotions around being in the ‘spotlight’. So I am wondering about the word competitive as it relates to shame. I certainly don’t want to compete for shame (tee tee). But I am seeking understanding around the unusual wording through a whisper on competitive shame:
Ego and competition are linked energetically as integral parts of the human experience. Spiritual competition is not immune to the energy of the ego. When someone with a similar skill set performs an act of service, one can easily reflect on their actions, or lack thereof. When a spiritually minded person experiences any form of competition, they can easily access the ego and feel shame with regard to this aspect.
Every person has a potential that is limited by their conditions, perception, and self-imposed rules. When limitations hold someone back, even momentarily, it becomes easy to reflect on your part in the event that played out. If there is competition and/or shame in the perception, then silence easily follows. Who among you wants to talk about your perceived shortcomings?
Feeling competition with a peer, with a lover, or with a total stranger is a natural occurrence that offers an opportunity for inner voice from the ego, and so does shame. Simply acknowledging another human for their act of service, and yourself for feeling shame, brings light out of the darkness. You can change your position and release lower energies by shining light on any misconceptions.
Incorrect thinking occurs on the path to authenticity, awareness, and spiritual growth, so see these things as signs on the road to higher consciousness. For without true awareness, you are sleeping in broad daylight and missing out on the greatest lessons life has to offer. Awakening energies mean being able to see and identify your shortcomings in all situations and under various conditions. Higher consciousness depends on movement with the energy of love.
Bring joy, ease suffering and create beauty, then dance like you mean it!
Blessings, Russell
“Perfectionism is a self destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame.”
― Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
