This term is derived from the 1944 film Gaslight, in which a husband uses methods to convince his wife that she is insane. The wife begins to question her sanity and her reality. Someone who persistently manipulates and brainwashes others is referred to as the gaslighter, while the person on the receiving end is called the gaslightee. All gaslighters are not even conscious of their harmful behavior or aware of being malicious.
The signs of gaslighting include being constantly subjected to reminders of flaws or shortcomings, and being scrutinized or made to feel as if there’s always something wrong with you. Attacking on a personal level creates a disparity in the relationship, giving the gaslighter power. The gaslighter makes you feel anxious and uncertain of the correct behavior, questioning your worth and self-esteem. Feeling like you are walking on eggshells around an individual is a sign that you are living with a gaslighter.
The gaslighter rarely admits their flaws or shortcomings, quick to blame and to create a misdirection by launching a new and false claim. The gaslightee begins to hold a distorted view of themselves and often says I’m sorry, without any real responsibility, indicating the gas has been lit! Seeking acceptance from the gaslighter indicates a codependent relationship has been established. The result of a gaslight relationship is usually feeling lonely and isolated due to apprehension and anxiety. Let’s get a whisper on the gaslighting relationship:
While the consciousness of a species evolves into a state of higher awareness, some humans will display the opposing energy. The Universal Law of Polarity will reveal the human global experience as the staircase of ascension. Each person must place themselves on every step to glean the energy and contribute their emotional intelligence to the collective consciousness. The complexity of human personality becomes an individual experience of awareness and contemplation, followed by the opportunity for calculated action and strategies for success.
Learning the language of love is part of the divine mission to all humans. When confronted with abuse on any level, we have an opportunity to take action using language to shift the energy. The language of love can be assertive without being unkind. The truth will shine even in the face of opposition. Boundaries must be established in any relationship that intends balance and cooperation. When balance is achieved, collaboration can create new ways of living in a world with harsh energies bombarding the individual on a daily basis.
Some feel that any form of engagement means that person loves them, even when the behavior is controlling, demeaning, or destructive. Any negative behavior demands the elevated perspective. Loving one’s self is taking the next step on the staircase to elevate consciousness, which is the lesson for humankind. Martyrdom is an old structure taught by those seeking control, and far removed from the path to enlightenment in today’s world.
The individual is responsible for their actions. When each person is willing to take responsibility for their actions, the destruction of the planet will cease, allowing love to move the human species into the next level of the evolving soul.
Bring joy, ease suffering and create beauty, then dance like you mean it!
Blessings, Russell
“Invalidating someone else is not merely disagreeing with something that the other person said. It is a process in which individuals communicate to another that the opinions and emotions of the target are invalid, irrational, selfish, uncaring, stupid, most likely insane, and wrong, wrong, wrong. Invalidators let it be known directly or indirectly that their targets views and feelings do not count for anything to anybody at any time or in any way.”
David Allen
