Reading an article by a highly successful billionaire led to some interesting food for thought. His advice: Just say no. The explanation was equally simple. People who are ambitious can easily fall into the trap of saying yes to everything. The search for an opportunity lures a person with a drive for success into the trap of never saying no. The result is a constant expenditure of energy that often leads to burnout.
Saying no is one of the greatest measures of self-care. It puts you home and in bed on time every single day. You are not distracted from your priorities and you have more energy to place toward your goals. Brilliant! I realized how hard it is to say no because most people then want to know why. You find yourself under cross-examination, having to explain all the reasons you are rejecting a request or invitation.
I know one person who is very successful, and I notice he is always saying no. This person doesn’t take kindly to being asked why, which means he’s not that popular, either. People-pleasing is also an issue with sensitive people. Avoiding conflict is never a guarantee for success, so maybe I need to practice forming my lips to make the sound of no. After all, I gave up my time with family to write, saying yes to a whisper on the subject of saying no:
Saying no is a skill that most do not possess, especially those who are experiencing high levels of stress or anxiety. For victims of trauma, saying no can be extremely difficult or even impossible. Boundaries are essential to wellness and recovery. Saying no allows other people to process their emotions without your taking them on. Reasonable people respond well to a no, and if someone is unreasonable with your response, it’s more cause to establish a boundary.
When used as an instrument, saying no can be a shield against exploitation. Over-committing is a form of over-cooperating, which is a sign of co-dependency. When expectations are not met, over-giving can lead to emotional reactions such as resentment, sadness, and withdrawal. Saying no to yourself is governing the urges as a way to contain and manage priorities. When you are productive and at peace, saying no carries the power and rewards through self-discipline. Just say no can be part of your personal evolution into a higher vibration.
There is power, integrity, and discernment with looking at the cost of saying yes. With any opportunity presented, ask yourself if you really want to commit, how much time and energy it will take, is it aligned with your goals, will it add value to your life, and why are you inclined to say yes in the first place? The answer to these questions will give the insights needed to decide and to get the language needed to communicate and maintain healthy relationships.
Staying focused on your goal is one of the biggest reasons to say no. Negativity can put an emotional cloud in your vision, but saying no is standing in your power during a moment of clarity and taking full responsibility for your actions. Saying no is recognition that you are in charge of your own limits. The ability to say no establishes a perimeter that says you truly know yourself and are willing to carve a space for self-love. Be clear about your choices and choose love in all your decisions, even if that means saying no.
Bring joy, ease suffering and create beauty, then dance like you mean it!
Blessings, Russell
“Real freedom is saying ‘no’ without giving a reason.”
― Amit Kalantri
The IEL Institute has a whole new approach to learning about the metaphysical offering ALL content for one low monthly price!
Learn more about the latest incarnation
at the IEL Institute for the Spiritual Arts
by watching this two-minute video.
